The view from my window

The view from my window
The view from my window

Thursday 20 January 2022

Well that's a relief!

A few days ago I received an email from my American friend (who lives here in France), sending me a copy of yet another article on just how safe these covid jabs are. Now I know she did this from the goodness of her heart but the difference between where we stand on this issue is actually a chasm. She was lining up to get her third jab and I'm bound and determined never to get the first. Anyway, poor M, she caught me on a bad day!

My kids are getting more and more pressure from so-called friends to get jabbed, despite the fact that they both recovered from covid at the end of November. Jordan's boss is not only his friend but they play in the same band together (they've known each other since they were about 15), but even he keeps making snide remarks about getting jabbed (he has also made other more crude remarks about Charlie's paternity - by way of a joke - but if I get my hands on him making that kind of "joke", I will rip his balls off)! Anyway he must have made one "joke" too many at band practice the other week because André hauled back and ripped into him. He told him EXACTLY what he thought of him and what a louse he thought he was when we all had covid. OK, nobody cares about the adults - we're all adults and we made our choices - but André let Max know EXACTLY what he thought of him as a so-called friend who couldn't even be arsed to call Jordan to find out how his seven-month old baby was after catching covid (perfectly fine, as it turned out, but Max didn't know that)! And with that, André walked out of practice. So yeah, you might say there have been a few tensions building up!

Then André was telling me last night that his friend spent 15 hours at the hospital last weekend with his gf - who is obese, a former drug addict (so not in the best of health) and who also has lupus. They spent 15 hours at the hospital after a lupus flare up and when André called to find out how she was his "friend" managed to call André a c*nt for not being vaccinated! Oh he knows it was tiredness and pressure, but André hasn't seen them for about six weeks and they live in Geneva, so André wasn't sure how it was his fault that the gf ended up in hospital. And as he said, anyone without a pass sanitaire has been unable to go anywhere these last six months so how the hell are we the ones spreading this virus?

Anyway, all that to say that when my friend sent me that article I blew a gasket and drafted a "both barrels" response. Thankfully I toned it right back down but to say it was direct would be an understatement. And I felt terrible after I sent it, but I also had no intention of recalling it - a "let the chips fall where they may" kinda thing! Oh I knew I would calm down eventually and in any case I had every intention of contacting her on Sunday before she goes into hospital on Monday for a hip operation. Anyway, she just contacted me to say that my email had gone into the trash folder but "message received"! And I felt like a real heel! So I wrote back to her and said that she should have left it in the trash folder, because that was where it deserved to be. I told her I didn't apologize for the content as I always say what I mean, but my diplomacy (or lack thereof) would probably have scored me a 1/10! 

I told her that I apologized for letting her have it with both barrels (even though watered down), I wished her good luck for Monday and promised not to ever write again when I'm fired up. And just like that we're friends again (although she was probably always too gracious to fall out over something like that). Just me being an asshole, I guess. I will always apologize when I'm in the wrong - rarely for content because I don't write or say things I don't mean - but I could definitely have done better on that one!


25 comments:

  1. Hey, sometimes you just gotta stand up for yourself. Good for Andre and you. Yes, we can all probably do with a little more diplomacy on how we handle things, but good for you for telling her your message/opinion stands, just not how you did it.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. We actually just spoke a couple of minutes ago and we're fine. I hate conflict and mostly just let things slide, but when I get pushed over the edge I am VERY direct. She can be very much like a dog with a bone for her part, but she didn't deserve to get blasted and I was an AH. I actually feel relieved that I've made my position more than clear though. And hey, we're still friends! Who wudda thunk!

      Delete
    2. Well, you're not alone in not getting jabbed. I have no plans to. And if your son and dil getting and recovering from the virus isn't giving them immunity from the virus, then I doubt getting jabbed is going to do any better at it. My bosses dh just got it and has had all 3 jabs.

      Delete
    3. We're seeing an absolute blow-up here of triple-vaxed getting sick too. Oh, I don't doubt that the vaccines helped enormously at the first outbreak, but now? Nope, there seems to me to be no benefit to it. It's getting to be more like acupuncture than vaccines!

      Delete
  2. I operate on a short fuse too but, as I got older, I have started being able to control myself a wee bit better.
    The whole vaccine thing is very personal. My cousins and their mom are not vaccinated. I never thought of preaching them because, they are adults. I may not agree with you on this but, I would not pressure you to believe in what I believe in. If I were in your shoes, I would probably react the same way. I am glad you and your friend are on good terms. Wishng her a fast recovery. As for Andre, what a great brother! I am glad he did what he did.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. I actually have a very long, slow-burning fuse. I'm so laid back I could fall over, but once I get past a certain point I'm done. And I guess I was tired the other night and should not have let her have it like that. That being said, she's no angel either and I love her anyway. I guess that's why we're friends, right? The ideal would be that we agree to differ (which is what I now have with my friend and my sister). We shouldn't be tearing each other apart on this issue. And you're right. André is Mr. Diplomacy himself but the other day he just let rip. And guess what, Max called Jordan to find out how the baby was - too little, too late? Maybe, but at least the message was driven home!

      Delete
  3. This topic is what has been causing so many problems with human communication. The fact that it is irrelevant whether you believe in the vaccine, itself,or not. It is about choices. We live in what we call a free world, with freedom of speech, religion and choice. Looking from the outside in, it would be hard to believe that is true with how things are going. I support your response to your friend, as well as Andres. Sometimes it just has to be said to let people know that their way is not necessarily the right way. They have their reasons, we have ours. Ranee (MN) USA

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Hi Ranee, what makes me sad is that people are tearing each other apart (but I also believe that is the aim of this BS). I blew up at my friend and then apologized and we're ok. I have the same difference with my sister in England - and we agree to differ. But sadly this divide and conquer approach is all pervasive - and I think that's the aim here.

      Delete
  4. It is a terrible world situation. While I think it seems to be very much luck as to how hard someone is impacted with Covid, at least in US, the hospitalizations seem to heavily lean to unvaccinated people. I'll just keep taking my precautions- no one gives a crap about my beliefs anyway so lectures will just piss people off. I just want this to end.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. I'm with you Sam. Even though I got my "pass" through having covid I still don't really go anywhere. The thing is as far as I can see the situation here in Europe is nowhere near as dire as it is in the States so we're dealing with very different numbers. What REALLY lights my fire though is the fact of having to "show your papers" to do anything. What the hell! My ex is in Pennsylvania and they can go anywhere and do anything they want and here we can't even sit on a café terrasse and have a coffee without proving you're vaxed. Can you see why I get so mad?

      Delete
  5. I'm vaxed and boosted. If you don't want the vaccine, that's fine. Keep in mind, natural immunities begin fading after 7 months. Has your sense of taste and smell come back yet?

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. What chaps my hide Dave is that over here they're making it so people don't have the choice. As of last Saturday here in France anyone who hasn't had their booster shot will have their pass taken away from them and will be considered unvaxed, despite already having two shots. So if they end up in hospital they will be classed as unvaccinated! But can you imagine being fined $8,000 every three months until you get your booster (Austria), or €100/month (Greece), or not being able to go to work AT ALL or take public transport AT ALL (Italy) until you get your shot? Or mandatory shots for everyone (Germany and Austria), although those have been pushed back for "technical reasons". You may not see it over there but if you Youtube "protests in Europe" you will see just how violent the feelings are over here. Yet here's England, Scotland, Norway (most of Scandinavia actually) and Spain putting an end to all covid restrictions and treating it as a seasonal flu, while we've still got the boot on the neck. As for me, I reckon my sense of taste and smell has come back a little - but definitely not totally. Still, it's good for the diet!

      Delete
    2. Yeah, I've seen some of the videos. We don't have those over here. Of course, on a good day only 2300 people die from Covid, on a bad day it's over 3000, and almost all of them are unvaccinated. My cover artist had it and lost her sense of taste and smell, like you it has only partially returned. Her doctor told her that's all it's going to come back. Evidently Covid causes tiny blood clots which have destroyed the nerve ganglia (?) and they don't grow back.

      Delete
  6. Have 3 examples over Christmas period amongst friends where one family member (in all cases younger adults, double vaxed and not yet boosted) caught Omicron variant but, despite living in the same house, their boosted parents didn’t catch it, so yes I think they do work. That said I’d never force anybody to have a vaccination if they didn’t want it, and on my own part just ask them to keep their distance and make sure I take my own precautions. I do believe we have to learn to live with this thing but whether the UK is heading too quickly into deregulation on the basis of purported immunity figures, a need to keep the economy firing or alternatively desire to save Johnson’s skin, only time will tell.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Oh and I meant to add, I think Johnson's all about saving his neck, but I guess time will tell!

      Delete
  7. There seems to be no rhyme nor reason to who gets sick or how sick someone gets does there. I have no problem keeping my distance from someone who would prefer it that way. Heck, with my current pass I could even go back to sewing club but I know a couple of women there would be uncomfortable so I don't go. I'll go back in the autumn I guess. Like I said above though, the fact that Macron is really turning the screws has put so many people's backs up and they are fighting back. Of course there's every chance the pandemic will be "over" in a few weeks when he announces he's running for re-election in April and needs to show everyone how great he is (as President of the European Parliament for the next six months he's getting hammered right now). There is a certain group of hardline governments in Europe at the moment and while I love living in France I might have to think very seriously about where I want to live if he (or Valérie Pécresse - Macron in a skirt) gets back in! He's incredibly unpopular but his backers have deep pockets!

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Anecdotally, from people I know, it does look as though a mix of vaccine types is giving more protection. However, as individuals we are placing more priority on testing than vax status at present, so I know that the people I mix with closely (who do happen to be vaccinated thrice now) are all testing every few days. With Johnson taking a more lackadaisical approach than Macron, we do have to take responsibility to protect ourselves in trying to live anything approaching a normal life.

      Delete
    2. I think if people were given the opportunity to take a non-MRNA vaccine there might be more uptake, but Macron's acting like the great dictator and MANDATING a third jab (and most likely a fourth) is making people resist more and more. Basically it's Pfizer or Moderna - no choice. The stupid thing is, people have been VERY GOOD about wearing masks and social distancing (at least around here) but when you get the Prime Minister saying you can go into a bar (only if you've been vaxed) but you can't stand at a bar it just becomes more and more ludicrous. Quite frankly, right now I would rather be in Britain than face another five years of Napoleon!

      Delete
  8. Omicron has definitely moved much faster than usual - almost half of my immediate family got it and everyone was as vaccinated as they could be. Even with my vaccinations, I don't go anywhere. I just tell my friends I want them to get the vax but it is their choice. I am glad you and your friend made up, and that your son stuck up for his brother!! Imagine not following up on your best friend's baby!

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. I agree omicron is spreading more easily but it definitely seems less potent. Yoga was cancelled last week because the teacher had caught it and when we started up again on Monday we asked how she was (she sailed through it in three days) and it turns out everyone in the room had had it too! And like you, I don't really socialize that much anyway so not an awful lot changed for me, but I resent having to "show my papers" to buy a coffee! As for my friend, I knew I would get over myself after I'd stewed a couple of days (I always do), but I'm glad I apologized too as it was the right thing to do. And I also agree that André was right to call Max out about the baby. He's like me, very easy-going but by god when we lose it ....!

      Delete
  9. It's a very touchy subject and we all have our own reasons why we choose to have the vaccination or not. I'm asthmatic and hubby is type 1 diabetic in need of a triple heart bypass, that's our reasons for having it. Getting angry and calling people names is crazy, it certainly wouldn't make me change my mind. Let's hope 2022 is the year we kick Covids arse once and for all. It's good that you made up and your family are loyal to each other.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. You're absolutely right Tania - it should be a personal choice. I think the aim all along has been to divide people and play one against the other and sadly it's working. The thing is, legally they cannot oblige people to have any jab (all the more so since they have to accept the responsibility if anything goes wrong), but that is why they are making it more and more difficult to avoid it. And I hope to God you're right about 2022 being the end of it!

      Delete
  10. I had 2 jabs then got covid in early December, as did my daughter and husband. We're being bombarded with requests to book a booster. As far as we're concerned we've had a far bigger booster due to actually having covid than we would through the small dose a vaccination contains, so we won't be having one, much to my mother's disgust.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. My goodness, if having two jabs AND getting covid doesn't give you immunity I don't know what does. Also, I heard it can be dangerous to get jabbed so recently after having caught covid. But you see how your mom is getting upset. My sister and her husband were like that, so I told her to get on with her life and leave me to get on with mine. While they don't agree with me, at least we're ok now - but sadly that's not the case in many families! I'm glad you and your family were ok though!

      Delete