Well I got back a bit later than expected last night due to roadworks having us divert through Annecy. We were expecting to get in around midnight but in the end we only made it back around 2 am. I wasn't driving, of course, but like most of us I was really glad to get home and back to my own bed! The trip was "different" - let's put it diplomatically - because while Andalucia is beautiful, travelling with a group such as the old fogies had more than its fair share of challenges. The majority were really nice and good fun, but as always it's just a few that make life harder on everyone! Sad to say that while Monique (the president) had done a sterling job organizing the trip with a Lyon-based travel agent, she really was in way over her head as far as the practicalities were concerned so an awful lot of it got dumped on me!
Anyway, I managed to pack pretty light (8kg instead of the 20 kg I was allowed) because I've long known that what you end up packing you end up carrying yourself at some point. Our trip to Lyon airport took just over two hours, but from a logistics point of view it wasn't great because our bus had to drop us off at the train station as the larger vehicles can't get near the airport terminals. That was where Monique started "moithering" already as she couldn't figure out where we had to go, despite the fact that she's been quite the avid traveller over the years. So I pulled out our paperwork, herded us all over to Terminal 1 and the Volotea desk, where our travel agent was waiting with our boarding passes. One of the ladies at club has a daughter who lives about six hours away and comes up every couple of months to see her mom. Mom is pretty deaf and the daughter (I started calling her Motormouth) managed to park her mom at the front of the bus (so she could hear better) and then seat herself at the back of the bus so she could run up and down yelling "Maman, are you following what she's saying"? To me it begs the question why she didn't sit next to her mom and help her, since mom also walks with a stick, but I guess it was an easier way to draw attention to herself if she ran up and down the bus screeching!
Anyway, as we were waiting to check in I saw that there was a commotion at the front of the queue and apparently one our ladies was out for the count after fainting. Motormouth then runs to the front of the queue to check on Maman (why wasn't she with maman to begin with?) and that's when it transpired that it was another lady who suffers from diabetes who had fainted. Over here we refer to first responders as firemen and the gate staff and firemen were immediately on the case taking care of this lady, but Motormouth kept insisting she knew better how to take care of her because she "worked in an old people's home" (I think she's a cleaner - teehee). It seems Motormouth is an expert on everything and eventually the firemen had to tell her to piss off because they knew where to find her if they needed her expertise later! On a side note, much as I loved her, my late sister-in-law was a bit like this - an expert on everything and everywhere she'd ever worked. She was once regaling us with all the ins and outs of local policing policy when eventually my nephew piped up and said "mom, you only type parking tickets"! She didn't like that very much but at least it shut her up for a bit, although no such luck with Motormouth! Ultimately our diabetic lady was fine (if embarrassed) and able to continue on with the trip!
Next came Leone who has a financial guardian that I've had to deal with on several occasions regarding payments for various trips/outings that she has wanted to do. She has money, it's just that she has someone else take care of her financial needs (and I have to admit they do a good job of it). All that to say that I know she has a guardian, but then why Monique would be discussing this with others on the trip is totally beyond me, and very unprofessional. Anyway, Leone also walks with a stick and needed assistance at the gate. When they boarded us, some of our group were at the front and the rest of us were scattered throughout the plane so there was no real way we could be sure our entire party had boarded. When the scheduled take-off time came and went we ended up sitting on the tarmac for about an hour before the pilot announced that they had had a no show and were in the process of removing a lady's luggage, and that was when they called Monique to the front of the plane to ask about Leone. Trouble is (and in my opinion this was pretty piss poor for a flight leaving from France) none of the cabin crew spoke French - it was either Spanish or English - so that's how I got dragged into the whole bar fight. Turns out airport assistance had taken Leone's hand luggage and put it on the plane for her, but when it came time to get through the gate they wanted to see her ID - which of course she couldn't give them because it was already on the plane! So they won't let Leone board because boarding is now closed, and they won't let Monique get off to go to her either, so we ended up taking off with Leone sitting in her wheelchair crying and Monique sitting next to me on the plane crying! Honestly this was a major screw up on the part of ground staff and because Leone is under very strict financial control, she basically had no money on her. Moreover, as we had just taken off we couldn't use our phones to call the travel agent until we landed (two hours later) - what a bloody mess. Ultimately the travel agents stepped in, got her a room for the night and reorganized her flight plus taxi plus special assistance for the next day. The thing is, if it had been me that got left behind, while I would have been pissed, I could at least get myself a hotel and sort things out from there but for it happen to Leone - well that was just about the worst person it could happen to! On a side note, I would have put Leone in her 80s but it turns out she's my age, so that came as something of a shocker too!
Then we had Sylvie, who had never flown before, and as we were taking off she thought it would be great to get a picture out of the window and jumped out of her seat to do so. The flight attendant (who had a face like she sucked lemons for breakfast every morning) yelled at her to sit down and we managed to drag her back to her seat. I know, I know, who the hell jumps out of their seat during take-off, but then the first time I ever flew I was too hot and tried to open the window, so maybe I shouldn't laugh. Anyway, once we levelled off, lemon-sucker came up to us and asked me to translate for her while she gave Sylvie a bollocking. Of course she was absolutely right but I can't say it did anything to strengthen the entente cordiale onboard either!
Anyway, we finally made it to our hotel and while the staff and the hotel itself were lovely, my room (for which I'd paid a single supplement) appeared to be the worst on the block, with the shower being barely big enough to get into (think smaller than an airplane toilet) and a brick for a pillow. I was tired and dirty and in no mood to argue right then so I didn't get much sleep first night either. The hotel rep turned out to be very professional and helpful, and the fact that he was also quite cute didn't go unnoticed by Motormouth, who promptly ran over to him to do a bise (the kiss on both cheeks) which is something you only do to people you know and not to people you've only just met - and certainly not to the hotel rep! Honestly, the woman is vulgar as well as loud-mouthed, and now here she was behaving like a bitch in heat - it was so embarrassing!
Luckily for me, our various excursions were lovely, which was just as well because my days of having to act like a tour guide and getting pulled from left to right by (a few) members of our group only got worse as time went on. Thankfully the majority of our group were totally independent and a great support but since I was the only one who spoke English and/or Spanish, a lot of the crap got dumped on me! So more tomorrow then!
Later in the afternoon - beautiful Mijas!
 |
| Mijas - a google image! |
